Outlaws, Outlaws, ….. everywhere.

It had been a very good Smoky-Drinky evening … well actually most of the night, prob all of the night for some. ln fact l do remember it being daylight when l finally crashed out. I awoke wanting coffee, so l made my way slowly downstairs to the kitchen. Music was still playing but at a low level, someone thoughtful had turned it down low in the early hours. l realised that ‘someone’ was probably me once l recognised the playlist that was on … it was my mellow playlist. We have numerous playlists from the 2000+ albums on the music system. The track currently playing was Brown Eyes by the Mac.

The smell of coffee hit my nostrils as l poured the hot water into the cup. What a glorious sensation that is first thing in the morning, definitely one of life’s pleasures. Something at the back of my mind told me there was something amiss in the kitchen, something missing. My brain tried to kick in and for a brief moment did … then spluttered to a stop like engines do on a cold winter morning. That brief moment had given me the answer though … the cats! Our 2 cats were usually there in a morning waiting for their humans to feed them. Waiting is not an adequate description as it omits the constant meowing, just in case your eyes didn’t see them.

Obviously the barbecue last night had more than accommodated their needs and they were now curled up asleep somewhere warm and secluded as cats do. The smell of last nights barbie was still lingering and l chuckled to myself as l wondered what the health food control freaks would’ve made of it. There was a great deal of red meat incl 16oz steaks … how much was that over the 70gm recommended limit?

Leaving the kitchen l made my way into the living room. One had to be careful as the floor was littered with plates, bottles, glasses, ashtrays empty cigarettes packets and one comatose human. Only the back of the head was visible from under the quilt but by the hair l deducted the form was female but l could’ve been wrong. l slumped into the leather armchair that was in the bay window and reached for some cigarettes. The ownership of the cigarettes were in definite dispute but they were my brand so it was close enough.

Picking up a lighter made me feel really smug with myself. l’d bought 6 lighters a couple of months ago, they are disposable lighters but they are big. So big that they rarely if ever get lost because they are about 6″ long and 1.5″ wide! No inadvertently putting them in your pockets etc, no losing them amongst the flotsam and jetsam … you just light up and put them down. l could see 2 others in the room and l wasn’t even really looking. These lighters really are a must.

Ahhhhhhh that first cigarette and coffee in a morning … words fail me. What could be more satisfying? … perhaps that cigarette after you’ve just had great sex? …. mmmmmmmm. As l contemplated this, l surveyed what had been our living room. Over on the sofa were two other humans, although identification was impossible as the only body parts visible were 4 feet … feet on the end of legs, not measurement.

Should l mention the pair of skimpy knickers on the floor? … no, better not.

Amongst the plates were bottles and glasses, lots of them, and they all seemed to be empty. The UK Treasury would not be happy though as all the wine and beer had been homemade. The Jack D wasn’t homemade but it had been bought abroad. Then there were all the cigarette and tobacco packets scattered about displaying various health warnings. One assumes they were health warnings but seeing as they were all in foreign languages how could l be sure? Nope, the UK treasury would definitely not be happy at all and neither would all the righteous health control freaks.

All this red meat, alcohol, tobacco … and all on the righteous outlawed list, yet wonderfully enjoyed by all our guests. These included non-smokers, smokers, male, female, different ages and all of them outlaws! What a great morning! Finishing my coffee and cigarette l rose from the armchair as Stay from Floyd began to play.

l then opened the curtains and looked out …. PERFECT!

John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Meryl Streep, Smoking Police and V8 Mustang

I’d been driving since late afternoon down the I-35 South from Minneapolis, Minnesota  in a rented 4.6L V8 red Mustang GT Convertible (it had only 900 miles on clock). lt was mid-summer and l had the hood down until dusk came and the temperature dropped. Until then it had been blazing sunshine and hot. Lynryd Skynryd’s greatest hits was blasting out ever since l bought it (along with some wrap around biker shades) at a truck stop and l’d had the hammer down as they say in the States. I was also wearing a bandana to protect my shaven head from the sun (good way too cool down, just soak the bandana in water) Large coffee in the cup holder, a few cans of Coca Cola, pack of Marlboro … life didn’t get much better than this! Perfection would’ve been a babe in the passenger seat … but hey, l wasn’t complaining.
Some will accuse me of posing … damn right l was!

As l continued driving through the night, hurtling past the trucks lit up like Christmas trees, l began to get tired. lt was about 1.30 am and l was deep into Iowa so l decided to look for somewhere to stay. A few miles further down the road l began to see signs for Winterset, Iowa …Birthplace of John Wayne. . It brought back fond memories of watching John Wayne movies with my late father so l decided then and there to go to Winterset. l pulled off the freeway and a few miles later arrived in Winterset and drove down John Wayne Drive. l’d expected a larger town but it was small … population 4764 and was to find later predominately white. Even now it only has 13 Asians, 7 Native Americans and 3 Blacks. Crime is almost zero and they’ve had just 4 traffic fatalities in over 10 years or more … and they were all down to drunk drivers.

Winterset at 2.00am in the morning is a ghost town and there was a distinct lack of motels. l then spotted a car ahead of me stopped at the traffic lights. lt was a police black and white. Pulling along side of it, the policeman turned to look at me as l powered my window down. l thought he was alone but suddenly a German Shepherd dog reared up from his back seat. lt didn’t bark at me … it just stared. The policeman also powered his window down. l realised later that what l was doing was not particularly the thing to do. l’m sure the American police are very wary of such things. His face showed no emotion and he probably had already reached for his gun.

His stern look disappeared when he heard my accent as l asked if he knew anywhere l could stay the night. ‘Are you British?’ he asked, l said yes. He grinned and then directed me to park up in the adjacent shopping mall parking lot. We both pulled over and l got out of the Mustang as he did his police car. l greeted him and reached for my Marlboros, lit up and then offered him one. He muttered he shouldn’t really but accepted my offering.

He told me there were not many motels in the area but said if l waited a while he’d make a call and see what he could do. He called the police station on his radio. He told his friend Mac that he had a guy from England looking for a place to stay the night so would he call Jimmy to see what he could do. l had no idea who Jimmy was but l did know it was past 2.00am in the morning and the police were just about to wake him up.

We continued chatting about where l was from, the usual associations Americans have with England … WW2 and so on. Whilst we were doing this he got the other participant out to meet me … Duke, his dog. l kid you not, it had to be Duke didn’t it? His radio then burst into life, it was Mac and he said that  Jimmy did have room for me. The policeman, or l should say Cole as we were on first name terms now, started giving me directions but then changed his mind and said to follow him.

The motel was just outside of town and we were met by Jimmy. l thanked Cole and then remembered l was running out of Marlboros so l asked him where l could get some. He said the cheapest place by far was the Indian Tobacco Shop but they were closed now. He then reached into his car and produced a pack of Marlboros and gave them to me. l asked him how much and he said $3 but when l looked in my wallet l had only $20 bills. Cole had no change and neither did Jimmy. Cole then said it was no problem and to just drop it off tomorrow at the Northside Cafe in town. l asked wherabouts it was and they both laughed. lt was another of Winterset’s attractions, it was where Clint Eastwood used in his Bridges of Madison County film with Meryl Streep. Not only that but other locations too and all the bridges round the town. I laughed and apologised for not knowing and promised to drop off his $3 the next day. With that Cole said bye and drove off. Jimmy checked me in and l crashed out.

The next morning l woke up and had coffee and a smoke whilst l read all the tourist literature on Winterset. l decided to stay for another night so l could have a look about. l went down to the town centre and there was Northside Cafe in the town square .. you couldn’t miss it. l went in, ordered a coffee and sat at the bar where Eastwood sat in the film. l asked the waitress if she could give Cole the policeman the $3 l had for him. She said there was no necessity to as he was in the backroom of the cafe.

l was just expecting to see Cole in the backroom but he was far from alone, it was some sort of town meeting. l apologised and turned to go back out. They wouldn’t let me, Cole introduced me along with the story of the Mustang and the Brit pulling up alongside of him. l stayed with them, having coffees brought me, smoking and talking about my country and theirs.After about an hour l finally left Northside Cafe accompanied by Cole and Duke (who l hadn’t noticed until we left). l asked Cole where the lndian Tobacco Shop was but he said there was no need. He took me over to his black and white and took a carton of Marlboros out the back. He said he’d been that morning for himself and if l wanted a carton he’d let me have them or he’d split them if l preferred. l paid him $30 for the carton, thanked him, said farewell and left.

I had a truly great day in the glorious sunshine driving around in the Mustang. l visited John Waynes House, the bridges, the farmhouse used as Streep’s home in the film (well the remains of, because an arsonist had set fire to it in 2003), other bridges and sites that weren’t in the film and met and talked to many friendly people along the way. As evening approached l pulled into the parking lot of the motel. After freshening up l ventured into the bar next to the motel, had something to eat … a steak! … a real steak that only Americans can do! Liberal amounts of JD and beer chasers turned into copious amounts and last thing l remembered about the bar was playing 8 ball pool with the locals.

The next morning after coffee and a smoke or l should say coffees and smokes, l loaded up the Mustang, dropped the hood, fired up the beast, turned the sounds up and set off to McCalester Oklahoma. Sadly in Missouri my relationship with the Mustang was to become the beginning of a premature end. l hit a pothole on the freeway (a freeway! not some poxy road … a freeway!) near Kansas City interchange to St Louis and smashed the front alloy wheel beyond repair. l had to change to the stupid emergency wheel that’s not much better than a bicycle wheel and limp on to McCalester. lt was early hours of the morning when l got there. The next morning revealed the rear tyre had now gone down too.

The rental company was ok but because it was McCalester Oklahoma they didn’t stock Mustangs or anything like it. All they had were saloons, nice saloons but no fun. Then l had a brainwave …. a pickup. So l ended up with a 5.7 L Dodge Ram, fully-loaded … a beast of a different sort but a beast none the less. Fun too, a different sort of fun but still fun.

Winterset wasn’t planned, it was off the cuff but it will remain one of the most cherished memories of my life.

l hope that you too will enjoy such an experience in your life or have experienced such already … and with that l’ll leave you with the actual 4.6Litre V8 Mustang GT Convertible …. and Freebird!

Halcyon Days!

Sons of Anarchy

This show is hidden away on Five USA but is a massive hit in the States, especially with the guys and bikers..Series 2 has just started here but in the States Series 3 has come and gone. Series 4 is now being filmed. I came late to the party but now courtesy of friends in the States, l too have finished Series 3. lt pulls no punches and is hard hitting. The show whilst being a drama is as realistic as a drama can be and conveys much of the realism of Outlaw MC’s … even Sonny Barger has a cameo role. The music that accompanies the series is excellent. The soundtrack in the clip is by Battleme and is a cover of Neil Young’s Hey Hey, My My. No apologies for the prevelance of smoking 🙂

Which brings me to Skegness Rock n Blues 2011. Many bikers were there but there was a distinct lack of ‘colours’ although many are from MC’s. In all the years l’ve been going l’ve never seen any trouble.

What is noticeable is smoking. Even though Butlins Skegness has a policy of no smoking in any of it’s accomodation … nobody takes any notice. We visited quite a few apartments of friends, old and new, and they were all smoking (legal and illegal) in the apartments. The venues are non-smoking but even there a minority take little notice and you don’t hear any of the righteous either … maybe they know to keep away? 🙂 Not forgeting the alcohol of course … smoky drinkys spring up all over the resort.

Smokers have been targeted and made outlaws by the righteous and governments. Well, be an outlaw and join many others who have no problem with being made outsiders … The Sons and Daughters of Anarchy one could say.

Update on Tobacco Companies restricting supply of UK brands

There have been no further responses from the 3 tobacco companies contacted. There was an initial reply from Imperial Tobacco and Japan Tobacco International but none at all from British American Tobacco.

In both the replies got, they refer to HMRC and recent large seizures of tobacco but furnished no details. Despite a great deal of investigation, l can find no details whatsover of these ‘large seizures’ so l questioned their actual existance. Turns out l was right to do so.

Since April 1st 2009 (good starting date, eh?) HMRC released their approach to ‘chain of supply’ and what they expected tobacco companies to do about it.

The crux of the ‘approach’ is to treat tobacco companies like UK shoppers purchasing tobacco from the EU. lf shoppers are stopped with what they consider large but we are still allowed to take them home but are issued with a Notice 1. This states the amount you bought back and warns that if you bring anymore back in a given period it will be confiscated. There are no fixed quantities for what HMRC consider large, it is left for them to decide.

This is basically what they have done to tobacco companies. If the seizures are large,  the tobacco companies will be issued with an Initial Notice (a warning notice) that lasts for 6 months. lf within this period another seizure occurs HMRC will then issue a Penalty Notice with a fine of up to £5 million (this of course can be contested). The only difference is that unlike the Uk shoppers, the tobacco companies have it stated what a large seizure is.

It is 500 sleeves of cigarettes (sleeve = 10 x packets of 20) and 50kg of tobacco or over. Anything under these amounts will not be considered large.

So were the tobacco companies issued with an Initial Notice? lf they were, why no details of such. If they were not, why the restriction of supply?

It doesn’t take a genius to note that sales of 500 sleeves of cigarettes and 50kg of tobacco to a shopper are probably not for personal use. Given that tobacco companies and HMRC monitor the sales and distribution of tobacco from the shops, how do such amounts get sold in the first place????

As for Mr Smuggler and the shops, one would think that to guarantee sales and supply that a self-imposed limit of 499 sleeves and 49 kg of tobacco ( or other blatantly obvious methods) would completely nulify the HMRC’s ‘chain of supply’ ???

In the meantime, the UK shopper cannot purchase his 3kg of tobacco as he was not made aware of the impending restriction of supplies. I have no doubt that Mr Smuggler and the shops did have pre-warning and took appropiate action. Our legitimate UK shopper is the only one that suffers … again!

Smoke is what freedom looks like

“An American Legion post in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan is taking a stand. They have decided to challenge a recently enacted statewide smoking ban in court. Their argument: Smoking bans are totally un-American.

“Michigan veterans fight for right to smoke – VFW post in Baraga defies state’s new ban, files lawsuit”

BARAGA — The veterans at the American Legion Post 444 see it as pretty straightforward.

Smoking tobacco is legal. They own, run and risk failure at their post’s tavern in tiny Baraga at the base of the Keweenaw Bay in the Upper Peninsula.
So they get to decide whether patrons get to smoke.

Now Foucault-Funke Post 444, where the ashtrays never came off the tables and smokers line the bar each afternoon and evening, is at the center of what could be a decisive showdown for the new state law and — as the vets see it — for the individual liberty and self-government they fought to defend.

Earlier this month, the post sued the Western Upper Peninsula Health Department to strike down as unconstitutional the department’s order to end indoor smoking.

Later on in the article:

The way one of those smokers, Baraga resident and auxiliary post member Anita Shepard, sees it, that smoke is what freedom looks like.
The new state smoking ban, Shepard said, is just one more encroachment on personal freedom, a decision handed down by out-of-touch politicians 500 miles away. She likens it to restrictions on gun rights and creeping government intrusion generally.

We’re not a communist country yet, but we’re only one step away from it,” she said.

Post specifically targeted over libertarian stance:

Post spokesman O’Leary, also the Baraga County prosecuting attorney, believes noncompliance with the law, especially in the libertarian-leaning Upper Peninsula, is more widespread than health officials acknowledge. The legion post has been targeted, at least in part, because it is openly defiant, he said.”

 Quite!…..  Best of luck to these boys

Send them a message of support  
mail@florissantlegion.org

Smoking Terrorism

I heard of someone tonight who takes delight in  inflicting terror on the anti-smoking fascists and their acolytes. His method is simplicity itself but seemingly very effective.

When he’s in an environment that is no smoking such as a pub or restaurant that is quite full of customers. He sits down at a table and either during his meal or whilst having a drink, slowly takes out a packet of cigarettes and carefully extracts a cigarette. Then placing it between his lips, he then searches for his lighter oblivious to the attention he is then receiving. By the time he has found his lighter this attention has now grown in number which increases further when he lights his lighter and brings it to his cigarette. At this point he says it’s sometimes possible to hear a pin drop. He then calmly extinguishes the lighter, takes the cigarette out of his mouth and whilst putting it away, then looks up at the audience he’s attracted and smiles.

When feeling particularly mischievous, he puts an e-cig in his normal cigarette packet and pretends to light and smoke it. Need l tell you of the reaction of the anti-smoking fascists who think they are about to die?

l think he’s just plain wicked and evil doing this and should stop it … when he tires of doing it! 🙂

D-Day Heroes and smoking … but don’t mention the French!

This Graye Churchill tank in the car park at Courseulles-sur-Mer is situated about 100 metres from the beach where it came ashore at the junction of the Green (left) and Red (right) sectors of Mike/JUNO Beach. Thus is where the Royal Winnipeg Rifles came on D-Day 6th June 1944. They suffered 128 casualties, the second heaviest Canadian regimental casualties of the day.

This tank came ashore and slid down into the flooded culvert, it sunk and was then hit by mortars. The sunken tank was incorporated into the exit road and there it stayed until 1976 when it was recovered, restored and moved to the car park. Also in the car park is a granite monument about 0.75 metres wide by 1.25 metres high. This monument is dedicated to the Canadian Scottish and Royal Winnipeg Rifles. h/t vicherley


Take a closer look at the photo and you’ll see in the top right hand corner a cross. This cross is about 50-60 ft high and in chrome and is actually on the beach. There is a large area decked out to accommodate it. lt is the Charles De Gaulle Cross commemorating his landing there as the Liberator of France. No he didn’t come on the 6th or 7th … not even the 12th when Churchill came. He came on the 14th! The only thing missing in the tank photo is there is also a flag flying there … yes, the French one.


The 3 D-Day vets that l’d taken were not very complimentary about it to say the least. Comments like ‘Fucking typical, our lads are shoved in the car park and that big nosed cunt gets a fucking giant memorial to proclaim himself Liberator of France” … “Cunt” … ” Do you know that there’s no figures for French casualties on D-Day?” … ” Yeah, did you see the leaflet on the war cemetries? 1000’s of Allied graves and even the Poles have 690 odd. The French one? … 90 … fucking 90!” … ” Liberator of France? … Cunt!”


l looked later at the leaflet and it did indeed say that. Later on when l’d taken them to bar and we were sat out in the sun having a beer … and a smoke, one of the vets said ” Y’know, l used to enjoy a pint and a smoke at the pub but it’s not worth going anymore. Hardly anyone goes. When l have been and l want a smoke l’ve got to shuffle out on these fucking sticks. Doesn’t matter if it’s pouring with rain, blowing a gale, fucking snowing … out l fucking go”

He went on “What really pisses me off is all them fucking anti-smoking cunts. They say it’s better for me, it’s healthier, it’s for my own good … l’m 85 for fucks sake!”


His mate replied ” Makes you wonder why we bothered, fucking fascists won in the end”

The Smoking Ban

The smoking ban … l’ll write my thoughts on it later. ln the meantime to find the truth about how it was forced upon us, the false charity ASH it’s director harpie Deborah Arnott, the false research and reports, false passive smoking claims, etc etc go to these blogs. l thoroughly recommend them. Lots of other subjects covered too … these guys know how to write!

Frank Davis        Dick Puddlecote      underdogs bite upwards